Every pregnancy comes with milestones; hearing the baby’s heart beat, the end of the first trimester, feeling the first kick and so on. I have been anxiously awaiting yet another milestone- twenty four weeks. Twenty four weeks hold a lot of significance for me. It is the point in pregnancy in which medical science has determined a baby can survive outside the womb. In high risk pregnancies, you will hear it referred to as V-day or the point of viability. But for me, it is also when I lost Ansley.

This pregnancy has not been an easy one for me. I haven’t enjoyed it the way most expecting mother do. I haven’t started working on the nursery or shopping for the babies. We haven’t picked out names, or talked about plans for the future. Chris and I decided early on once we hit 24 weeks, we would get started on planning for the babies. But the idea of planning and verbalizing hopes and dreams before that point was too scary.

Today, I am 24 weeks. This day comes a relief and a reminder. Each day from this point forward is a new day, one I didn’t experience in my pregnancy with Ansley. A painful, yet comforting thought all at the same time.

I know this pregnancy will have a better outcome. I have said all along they are watching me closely. Closely, took on a whole new meaning Wednesday evening. Twelve, Twelve, Twelve, the day I was put on hospital bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy.

I will spend, what hopefully will be, a very long time in this hospital room. My current goal is 28 weeks, January 12th to be exact, but I am pulling for something closer to Valentine day. Christmas will be a little different this year, as will New Year’s, I will miss seeing my dog, sleeping in my bed, and enjoying the outside. But, in the grand scheme of things, all minor sacrifices in hopes of having 2 healthy baby boys.

The reason for the hospital bed rest is a little thing called intermittent absent diastolic blood flow. What that means is when my heart is pumping, baby is getting blood and when my heart is at rest (in-between beats) the blood should continue to flow through the umbilical cord to the baby. But, sometimes, for some reason, it cuts out for a second. While this sounds problematic, it really isn’t. I have a very minor case which isn’t affecting the baby in any way. But, with my history, my doctors decided it wasn’t worth taking the chance. HELLP syndrome is linked to a weak placenta and this condition is also linked to a weak placenta. In the event it gets worse, and turns into reverse blood flow, it could cause some distress to baby. The level of distress would determine if we would have to deliver, so that the baby could get the medial intervention needed. There is equally as likely of a chance that it will not get worse or it could possibly resolve all together. There are a lot of unknowns, so we are taking the better safe than sorry approach.

The other benefit to being in the hospital is the frequent testing for me. When I developed HELLP syndrome, it came on quickly and without normal symptoms. This time, should I start to develop Pre-Eclampsia or HELLP, we would know very early.