Monthly Archives: March 2015

(repost) St. Patrick’s day- 2011

17 Tuesday Mar 2015

Posted by in Ansley, Pregnancy

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It was a Thursday, St. Patrick’s Day, a co-workers birthday, I was getting my annual performance review or at least that is how I thought my day would go.  By lunch time, I was in agonizing pain.  My back hurt, but of course my back hurt I was 6 months pregnant.  That is normal right?
I called my boss and asked if we could do my review now, so I could leave and go to the chiropractor.  I hadn’t been to the chiropractor in years, but this would be my third trip in a week.
She felt around my back, nothing really out of line and mumbled to herself in a frustrated tone,  “I have to figure this out, if only I could x ray you. But I can’t, your pregnant, all the more reason to figure this out… pain is bad for you or baby, it will raise your blood pressure.”
As I laid face down on her table, I was unsure if she was speaking to me or to herself, but her words echoed in my head.  I went home; dug out an old home blood pressure machine I had gotten after my dad’s stroke many years before, hunted down some fresh batteries and checked my blood pressure for myself.  130/70- completely normal.  About the same as it had been when I was at the doctor the week before.  The same light hearted doctor’s appointment where I was told I was having a picture perfect pregnancy.
 

(repost) The Before Snapshot

16 Monday Mar 2015

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It has now been several years since I originally posted the blog below. In honor of Ansley’s upcoming 4th birthday, I decided to repost my story from the begining…

I recently read a book, Heart of the Matter, by Emily Giffin.  The book began “…I find myself reconstructing those final, ordinary moments. Moments that make up our lives. Moments that were blissfully taken for granted—and that likely would have been forgotten altogether but for what followed. The before snapshots.”

I am all too familiar with the before snapshots, those days where everything was right in my world.  When I truly felt my life was going absolutely perfect.  I couldn’t have planned it better.  Before my world was turned upside down.  This week is the one year anniversary of my before.  I remember every detail as if it happened yesterday.  I can tell you the weather, what I did day to day, even what I was wearing.

Having given myself a year to grieve and allow my heart to begin to heal, I felt it an appropriate time to start my blog and share my life and my story. My hope is that I can raise awareness.  Awareness for a condition called HELLP, which took the life of my daughter.  A life that had not “really” yet begun.